Chapter 17 — Religious Differences

_January 13, 2003, Chicago, Illinois_

🎤 Steve {br}

{psc} {_ The body of Nadia Granger, twenty, of DeKalb, was found in a vacant apartment in Lincoln Park. Police say she died on the 3rd or the 4th, but are not releasing any further details, except to say that foul play was involved in her death. The apartment, in a four-flat owned by Yuusuke Holdings, has been vacant since December 30, and the new tenant was due to move in on February 1st. Police say they have solid leads and are investigating several persons of interest, who they declined to name.

Miss Granger, who worked for the law firm Thomas Phelps and Associates as a paralegal, went missing on January 3rd, after being dropped off in Lincoln Park by American Taxi. Her parents reported her missing on January 5th when she failed to arrive at their Naperville home for a family dinner. _}

"Is that you?" Kara asked after I finished reading the article aloud while we waited for the police evidence tech on Monday morning. "The 'person of interest'?"

"Yes, but my alibi is airtight," I replied. "I'd say the reason the cops want my DNA, the video, and to talk to the people to confirm my whereabouts is because they have no suspects. The question to which the answer may never be discovered is why she went to Lincoln Park, unless she told the cabbie. I asked Danielle yesterday afternoon, and she didn't know."

"Is Danielle going to be OK?"

"I think so. John and Tabitha will take care of her, and I let her know I'd help in any way I can."

"She's seeing someone, right? I mean dating, not a counselor."

"Yes. A guy named Tony who works with John."

"That was the guy in his late forties she had with her on New Year's?"

"Yes. She had made the point she wanted an older man to Tabitha, and John introduced her to Tony."

"What happened with your art student?"

"Given recent events, we didn't have a chance to talk, and I basically derailed Philosophy Club by raising the issue of wanting to start a third chapter. I'll call her once things settle down and make arrangements to see her artwork."

The doorbell rang, and I went to answer it and let Julius into the house. He joined us in the kitchen for coffee, and about ten minutes later, the doorbell rang, and there was a knock, the telltale sign of the Chicago Police Department.

"Here we go," I said as I got up.

I went to the foyer, followed by Julius, and opened the door to find the two detectives and a young guy with thick glasses who looked like a classic nerd.

"Good morning, Mr. Adams," Detective León said, then nodded, "Mr. Crane."

I let them in and shut the door behind them.

 "We have a slight change of plan," Detective Madison said. "We'll scrub through the video at high speed, and if it confirms what you've told us, we won't need full copies."

"Why is that?"

"Your alibi checks out. We spoke to the master of the dōjō, the owner of the restaurant, and the cabbie."

"And the DNA?"

"We'll take that to positively rule you out."

"Do you have any suspects besides me?"

"I'm sure you know we're not at liberty to say."

"Then let's get started."

————— {br}
🎤 Birgit {br}

"What happened with your dad and Jesse?" I asked Zahra at lunch.

"Jesse was fine, but you know the problem. I can still come over for homework, so long as Zaida is with me all the time."

"What about Friday nights?"

"My dad is going to talk to Jamal's dad, and so long as Jamal is there and I'm with Zaida, I can go. That means no movies because Zaida isn't usually allowed to go."

"That stinks! What about the Girl Gang?"

"So long as it's all girls and no boys at all, it's fine."

"Ugh. Does Jesse know?"

"No. I didn't think it was wise to call him. Will he be home tomorrow when we do homework?"

"Probably."

"Do you think you could ask him to come to the house so I can talk to him?"

"Sure. And I won't rat you out!"

"I was positive! Thanks."

We took our trays and went to sit with our usual lunch group, which included my sisters and their friends, as well as my friends.

————— {br}
🎤 Steve {br}

"Thank you for your coöperation, Mr. Adams," Detective Madison said. "The videos confirm your statements, so we would like the fifteen minutes before she arrives until the cab leaves. And ask you to save the complete videos."

"I'll do that," I agreed.

We spent the next thirty minutes making the tape, and then the evidence tech swabbed the inside of my cheek to collect DNA.

"Is there anything else, Detective?" Julius asked.

"Just the contact information for the man who was here just before Miss Granger arrived."

I wondered how Jamaal Rahim would take the questioning, but there was no reasonable way to refuse. I wrote out his name and phone number and handed it to the detective.

"Anything else?" Julius asked.

"No, Mr. Crane; that's it."

"Would you please call me with the results of the DNA test?"

"Yes, though if there's a match, which we don't expect, we'll arrest Mr. Adams before we call you."

"He'll turn himself in," Julius said.

"I believe you, but for rape-murder, we can't do that."

That confirmed what I had suspected, which they had never formally said. As there was nothing else, I escorted them to the door, and once they left, Julius and I went to my study.

"I haven't shared the details of what Nadia was doing here, and they haven't asked, which actually surprised me."

"Because it's not relevant if your DNA matches. They're playing it cagey, and honestly, the police don't need a motive if they have a DNA match. That's up to the prosecution, but with DNA, they don't need much beyond showing some relationship between having sex and her time of death. Are you thinking of volunteering the information?"

"Yes, but it's likely to sound incriminating."

"Then I suggest you wait until they rule you out via DNA matching before you say anything. If they happen to ask, tell them that on the advice of counsel, you decline to answer until after the DNA results are returned. The last thing you want is for them to arrest you and then drag out the DNA testing for weeks and weeks while you sit in jail with no bail for rape-murder."

"Do you want to know now?"

"Yes. Unless you're discussing the commission of a crime in the future or you propose perpetrating fraud on the court or tampering with witnesses, I'm obligated to keep anything you say confidential."

"She had a pair of fantasies she wanted to play out – one was the virginal babysitter seducing the dad who drove her home."

Julius laughed, "And the main reason it's the _mom_ who drives the babysitter home these days!"

"Yeah," I chuckled. "That one was something I could actually roleplay. Her other request was one in which I simply couldn't participate — to lose her virginity while tied spread-eagled to a bed."

"Hang on! How do you roleplay THAT?"

"You don't. She wanted to live out that fantasy."

"She was a virgin?"

"So she claimed, and I'm positive you know it's impossible to know one way or the other in the vast majority of situations where the girl is over the age of consent. Nadia was twenty, and I only have her word for it."

"That's why she left? You declined?"

"Yes. And there are Instant Messages which reference her fantasies, but no details. As far as I'm aware, Danielle did not know."

"You absolutely do _not_ want to share that with the detective until the DNA test results are available. I'm not sure you should share it with them unless they ask. Why would you want to?"

"To give them something to go on to find her murderer, but also to say that it might not have been rape if they're basing that determination on ligature marks on her wrists or ankles. That would also be relevant to the defense of any suspect."

"You won't like what I'm going to say, but other suspects are not your concern."

"Understood, but you know once they rule me out, they're going to come back and ask. Getting out ahead of it seems to make sense to me."

"And, from your perspective, where you know you didn't do it, that makes sense. But they still think you _might_ have done it. Confirming your alibi is persuasive but not conclusive. If it were conclusive, they wouldn't have done the DNA swab. Wait for the DNA tests, and, as I said, if they come back with questions, decline to answer until after the tests. You can refer them to me, obviously."

"OK. Thanks for being here today,"

"You're welcome! I'm going to head out."

I walked him to the door, we shook hands, and once he'd left, I went back to my study.

————— {br}
🎤 Jesse {br}

"Angelina is in a foul mood," Luna observed at our lockers after school. "I saw you chatting on Friday night. Did something happen?"

"She asked to talk, and we had lunch yesterday. She wants to be a couple, and you know my take on that."

"Not until after at least two years of college, and probably all four."

"Yep."

"I'd love to be your girlfriend, but I knew going in that wasn't the possibility. But I liked YOU going in, so…"

I laughed, "And I liked it, too."

"My parents will be out late Friday night. Could we get together after the movie?"

"Sure. I can drive you home afterwards to avoid curfew."

"I turned eighteen during break, so not necessary!"

Simone walked up, so I said 'goodbye' to Luna, and Simone and I headed for my house.

"I need to leave by 4:45pm," she said. "My mom is home around 5:30pm, and I want to make sure I'm at my desk doing my homework!"

"That gives us about two hours," I said.

"More than enough for you to fuck me three times! And use your mouth! You'll earn your reward again!"

"I won't turn that down!"

"No boy would!"

————— {br}
🎤 Birgit {br}

"What are you doing home?" I asked Dad when I came into the house with Fangsu after Photography club.

"The detectives were here until about 1:00pm," I said.

"Did you find out anything more about what happened?"

"The police believe she was raped before she was murdered."

"Cut his nuts off!" I growled.

"A sentiment held by most women," I said. "He'll get life in prison, for sure."

"And hopefully have a three-hundred-pound cellmate named 'Bubba' who won't take 'no' for an answer!"

"No matter what someone has done, they do not deserve to be raped. How was Photography Club?"

"We're talking about lighting, including using filters. Sorry, but I need to do geometry and biology homework."

"OK."

I left Dad's study, and Fangsu and I went to my room, rather than sit in the sunroom, because I needed to use my computer to write a lab report. About forty minutes later, I finished it and started on my geometry problems.

"Can I ask a question," Fangsu said.

"Sure. What?"

"I, uhm, want to do it with Mitch, but he's, er, big, and I'm kind of afraid."

"First, have you both had STI tests? And agreed on birth control?"

"Yes."

"Then do you remember what Aunt Bethany's book said? That if a baby is able to be born, it's impossible for a guy to be 'too big'."

"Sure, but I've never even used a tampon or anything," Fangsu said.

"Get some lubricant," I said. "You can get it at CVS, or if you're embarrassed, I have a brand-new tube I can give you. The same is true if you need condoms."

"I thought you were on the Pill!"

"I am, but Dad keeps condoms and lubricant in the closet with Band-Aids and stuff. He makes sure they're there in case anyone needs them."

"My parents are pretty open-minded, but not _that_ open-minded!" Fangsu declared. "Your dad is totally cool and a hunk, for an old guy!"

I laughed, "He's not even forty yet! My grandpa — his dad — is eighty-five!"

"OK, but I meant, you know, for _that_."

I laughed again, "I'm pretty sure he can still do it! My moms seem VERY happy!"

"That is not what I meant!" Fangsu declared. "I meant ME! I'm the same age as you, and that's just too old! I could see going out with a Senior, but a guy that old? No way!"

I shrugged, "I think older guys are the best!"

"How old was the oldest guy you've been with?"

"Pinky-swear you will NEVER say anything?"

"Yes!"

We locked our pinkies and shook.

"Thirty-six," I said.

"WHOA!" Fangsu gasped. "And?"

"The absolute best sex I've had, bar none! I want to be with him again, but it'll probably be over a year from now before I can arrange it again."

"You really didn't think it was gross?"

"No way, or I wouldn't have done it. But each of us has to decide for ourselves. Has Mitch done it before?"

"No."

"Then my advice, if you want your first time to last more than a few seconds, is to give him a blowjob first. Then he can last a lot longer!"

"I remember the book discussed premature ejaculation."

"It's _always_ premature, no matter how long it takes if you haven't had an orgasm!"

"Did you have one the first time?"

"With a guy? Yes. But remember, it's up to you to guide him to what you need, and if you don't orgasm from screwing, he should use his mouth. You'll probably have to tell him, so if you don't know from rubbing yourself, do that so you know what it takes. The other thing to remember is what the book said — make sure you have enough time so you aren't rushed and are in a place where you won't be interrupted."

"That's the problem because his mom doesn't work, and my brother is home."

"You could use one of our guest rooms," I offered. "Nobody would bother you."

"You're sure?"

"Positive. Mitch can confirm with Jesse."

"And your parents will be cool with it?"

"They won't mind," I said.

"Thanks. Sorry I kept you from your geometry."

"Sadly, it's not going anywhere! I loved algebra, but geometry is a pain in the butt!"

————— {br}

_January 14, 2003, Chicago, Illinois_

🎤 Jesse {br}

There was a knock at the back door just as Missy and I began doing our homework after integrating for an hour. I excused myself and went downstairs.

"What's up?" I asked Birgit, who had let herself in and was waiting in the kitchen.

"Will Miss Tuesday be OK if you come over to the house to talk to Zahra?"

"Yes," I chuckled. "I'll let Missy know, then come over. I take it her dad is interfering?"

"Pretty much," Birgit agreed. "She and Zaida will be in the Indian room."

I went upstairs to let Missy know I needed to go to the main house, then went back downstairs. I walked across the yard, went into the house, then joined Zahra and Zaida in the Indian room. Zaida stepped just outside the room to give us privacy, but where she could see Zahra.

"Hi," Zahra said.

"Hi," I replied. "What did your dad say?"

"I can only be with the group if I'm with Zaida and Jamal. He spoke to Jamal's dad, and Jamal will walk Zaida and me home after we eat on Fridays. And I can't go anywhere there are boys without Zaida with me. I can come to your hockey games, but only with my dad, and we can't go out to lunch."

"I guessed that was what was going to happen," I said. "I'm sorry."

"It's not your fault," Zahra said. "But I still want to see you."

"It's up to you," I said. "You have to decide to follow your dad's rules or not and be prepared for the consequences. And what happens when he asks Zaida if she was with you the whole time?"

Zahra smirked, "Well, he did say I had to be with her, and she had to do whatever I was doing!"

I laughed, "There is no possible way he meant THAT!"

"Obviously!" Zahra declared.

"I think, in the end, you and Zaida have to work that out between you. I'll be home at my usual time tomorrow."

"OK. I'll talk to Zaida."

I said 'goodbye' to her, then returned to the coach house to complete my homework with Missy, then integrated once more before walking her home.

————— {br}

_January 15, 2003, Chicago, Illinois_

🎤 Steve {br}

I had just signed on to my computer on Wednesday morning when _adium_ chimed.

{block}{tt} Rayleigh1: Hi! It's Emma! {br}
NIKASteve: Hi! I see you changed your AIM nickname! {br}
Rayleigh1: I have two accounts now. The other one I use with Dad. How are you? {br}
NIKASteve: Great! And you? {br}
Rayleigh1: Counting down the days! Only 143 days until I move to Chicago! {br}
NIKASteve: I'm looking forward to it! {br}
Rayleigh1: I IM'd Natalie, and she said she's going to Russia this Summer. {br}
NIKASteve: Yes, and Yuriko is going to Japan. We'll have a house guest, though. {br}
Rayleigh1: Another member of the subversive cell? {br}
NIKASteve: Yes. She'll start at Stanford in the Fall but wants mentoring during the Summer. {br}
Rayleigh1: 🤣 'Mentoring' {br}
NIKASteve: As my daughter would say, 'What-ever!' {br}
Rayleigh1: So long as you have time for me, it doesn't bother me. I mean, I'm sleeping with a married man, so it's not as if I have ANY room to talk! {br}
NIKASteve: Married, but unconventionally. {br}
Rayleigh1: I'll say! Mrs. Spencer knows everything, right? {br}
NIKASteve: More than most! {br}
Rayleigh1: Was she your MILF? 🤪 {br}
NIKASteve: I certainly noticed how beautiful she was! Beyond that, no comment! {br}
Rayleigh1: Uh-huh. Ever had both a mother and daughter? {br}
NIKASteve: Again, no comment! {br}
Rayleigh1: 🤣 I need to get going. School awaits! L8r! {br}
NIKASteve: L8r! {/tt}{/block}

I minimized _adium_ and opened _Outlook_ to check my calendar for the day, and with no meetings, I called Shaye's number. I reached an answering machine and left her a message, asking her to call when she had a chance and apologizing once again for Sunday.

"Morning!" Penny exclaimed, coming into the office. "I see they're knocking down exterior walls on the annex."

"They're on track because we haven't had any 'Snow Emergency days."

"I'm still annoyed you didn't have the sauna built in our office!"

I chuckled, "Can you imagine Bob's reaction to _that_, especially if it was used the way I use my sauna at home? Just be happy we still have our private bathroom! And wet bar!"

"At least _you_ leave the seat down!"

I chuckled, "Given the male-female ratio in my house, compared to yours, it shouldn't surprise you."

"I just want a day when I can go into ANY of our bathrooms and not find pee on the floor! I swear it's on purpose!"

"With Andrew and Stephen, I suspect it's more not caring. I can't speak for Terry."

"He did say he'd be OK with the deal Birgit suggested," Penny smirked.

"And you know why it's a bad idea," I replied.

"Seriously? Your rule is consent, not acquiescence, and he'll tell you straight up he's absolutely OK with it!"

"And when you go back and ask _again_?" I inquired. "Because you know you will!"

"But if I promised?"

"Could you actually make and keep that promise? Be honest, please."

"But if Terry is OK with it…"

"Penny, setting aside the problems we'd have with Bob, would Terry be OK with you focusing all your attention on me? I mean, more than you do because we work together?"

"But I wouldn't!"

"Yes, you would," I countered. "And you know you would."

"And if I made Amber contingent…"

"Then you get to explain to her why. Remember, I said I'd follow your guidance on that, and if you say 'no', then it's 'no', but I will tell her why."

Penny glared at me, "You're being mean!"

"You know better, Pretty Penny. I love you dearly, but no. We have work to do."

"Just no fun!" she groused. "No fun at all!"

————— {br}
🎤 Jesse {br}

When I arrived home on Wednesday, I fixed myself a snack, then sat down to read _The Scarlet Letter_ for English class. I didn't like it, but I had no choice but to read it. I didn't particularly like Early American literature, so it was something of a slog. I read for about thirty minutes before Albert came to the door.

"Zahra is here and wants to talk to you," he said. "She and her friend are in the sunroom."

"Thanks," I said. "I'll be right over."

I put a bookmark in my book, used the john, then walked across the yard. I went into the house, then to the sunroom.

"Hi," I said.

"Is there someplace we could go in this house?" Zahra asked.

"Yes," I replied. "There's a room off the kitchen we can use. Zaida could sit in the kitchen."

"That's fine," Zaida said. "I can do my homework."

The three of us went to the kitchen, and Zaida sat down. I asked if she needed something to drink, got her some lemonade, then went into what Aunt Kara called the Playroom with Zahra. I shut and locked the door behind us, then led her to the bedroom.

"Are you sure about this?" I asked.

"What do you mean?" Zahra asked.

"Having to lie and directly disobey your dad? And knowing we can't spend any time together unless you sneak here? And then only for sex?"

Zahra frowned, "I don't know what to do. I want to be with you. Don't you want to be with me?"

"Yes, I do. I'm worried about you."

"You mean because I'm in love with you?" Zahra said quietly.

She said what I knew to be true and had more or less ignored because she said she knew nothing would ever come of the relationship.

I nodded, "Yes."

"You knew?" she asked.

"I had a pretty good idea," I replied. "But that was after we'd been together a few times. You know the problem."

"I know, Zahra sighed. "I don't think it's right that if you were the girl and I was the guy, it would be OK."

"Me, either," I replied. "But even then, it would be a problem."

"Why?"

"Because I want to be able to go to church as a family, just as I'm sure you want to be able to attend your mosque as a family. We had agreed it was just about being together, but then it changed for you. I like you a lot, I mean that, and I want to spend time with you, but your dad won't allow it."

"I want to spend time with you, too, but unless one of us changes religion, we aren't going to be able to do that except in secret, and your parents would never permit you to go to my church, even if you wanted to."

"I know," Zahra sighed. "Make love to me? Please?"

————— {br}
🎤 Steve {br}

Shaye returned my call just before 4:30pm.

"I'm really sorry about Sunday," I said.

"Everything is OK, right? I mean, with the cops?"

"Yes. They asked a bunch of questions and asked more on Monday. Unfortunately, I don't think they have any leads."

"That's scary. Deanna told me about a girl who was raped and murdered when she was in her first year. They questioned her patron but cleared him. When can we get together?"

"If you don't have class tomorrow afternoon, could I see your artwork?"

'THAT is why you want to get together? Seriously?"

"Given my schedule, yes. The next few weeks are going to be busy because I have to fly to Florida on Sunday afternoon for our annual corporate retreat. I have plans for most of the following weekend, and then I'm going to Arizona. After that, I have to fly to Rochester for a checkup at Mayo."

"So when do you actually have time for what you obviously wanted?"

"Remember, I was surprised that it worked! Let's get together tomorrow, look at
your art, and then we'll figure out what's next. How about 3:30pm tomorrow?"

"Sure. Meet at the school? I have shared studio space there."

"Sounds good."

————— {br}
🎤 Jesse {br}

"Can I see you against next Wednesday?" Zahra asked as we got out of bed after two rounds of gentle sex.

"I want to, but I'm worried about you."

"You mean because of how I feel? Or because of my dad?"

"Both, really," I said as I led her to the shower.

I turned on the tap and adjusted the temperature, then held out my arms. Zahra stepped into them and sighed deeply.

"It's my fault, really," she said. "I knew nothing could ever come of this, but I wanted to be with you, and then I fell in love with you. I'm sorry."

"You don't have to apologize for your feelings," I said.

I carefully moved us into the shower and closed the glass door, allowing warm water to cascade over our bodies.

"It really is up to you at this point, but please take everything into consideration."

"Can I tell you something funny?"

"Sure," I said as I began soaping Zahra's sexy body.

"I teased Zaida about being with me at all times, you know, like my dad said."

Visions of having _both_ girls popped immediately into my head because Zaida was nearly as sexy as Zahra, at least as best I could judge, with her always wearing a scarf and loose-fitting clothing.

"Somehow, I don't think that's going to happen!" I said.

Zahra laughed, "No because she is adamant that she be pure for her husband. But the desire is there."

"Because she's a normal teenager!" I declared. "So, teasing Zaida about it aside, what do you want to do?"

"If I could have anything I wanted?"

"Sure," I said.

"For you to become Muslim and eventually have a family together. I know that won't happen, but if I could have anything, that's what I would want."

"You're fifteen, and I'm not quite seventeen," I replied. "We're way too young to think about that seriously."

"Not in my faith and culture," Zahra said as she began rinsing off the suds. "It's normal for girls to marry at sixteen, or sometimes younger, in the village where my parents are from and where I was born."

"It's legal to get married here at sixteen with parental approval, but I think people would completely freak out if anyone tried that now, at least in Chicago. I'm positive DCFS would get involved and cause all kinds of trouble."

Zahra finished rinsing off and began soaping my body.

"Also," I continued, "even if it were possible, and I did what you said, I wouldn't be able to support a family until I graduate from college."

"I know," Zahra replied. "But I would love to be able to sleep in the same bed with you! And then my dad couldn't say anything! I like being with you that way!"

"And I like being with you, too," I said. "So, setting aside the fantasy, what do you want to do?"

"I guess I need to think about it," Zahra said.

She finished soaping me, I rinsed off, and then hugged her under the cascading spray for a minute. I turned off the tap, we got out, dried off, then dressed. Zahra helped me change the sheets, then we went out to the kitchen.

"Have fun?" Birgit asked with a smirk.

I simply rolled my eyes, hugged Zahra, then headed to the coach house.

————— {br}
🎤 Birgit {br}

"Thanks for letting us come over while you were at Photography Club," Zahra said.

"You're welcome. Will you be here for homework tomorrow?"

"Yes."

"And next Wednesday?" I asked with a smirk.

"Can I talk to you privately?"

"Sure. We can use my dad's study."

"Zaida, wait here, OK?" Zahra asked.

Zaida agreed, and Zahra and I went to my dad's study, where I shut the door.

"What's up?" I asked.

"I'm afraid of what my dad might do if he found out about Jesse and me."

"Do you think he'd hurt you?"

"Maybe, or hurt Jesse."

"I know you want to keep seeing Jesse, but you know he's not going to become a Muslim, right? And you aren't going to become a Christian, so as much fun as it is, maybe you should stop."

"But I love him!" Zahra protested.

Warning bells flashed, and I wondered if Jesse knew.

"You're fifteen, right?" I asked.

"Yes."

I thought back to my talks with Fatimah, and Zahra's situation wasn't quite as extreme, but she was, in effect, in the same trap. And a trap she could only escape by walking away from Islam. And at fifteen, living at home, that would be tough.

"As much as I hate to say it," I said, "there isn't really anything you can do unless you can change your dad's mind and you're willing to become a Christian."

"I can't do that," Zahra said. "My dad…"

"Would you do that for Jesse?"

"I don't know," Zahra sighed.

I needed to talk to Jesse before I said anything.

"I don't know what else to say," I said. "You can hang out with us as much as you want and be here whenever you want."

"Thanks, Birgit."

"You're welcome."

We left the study, got the other girls, and went to the sunroom to do homework.

————— {br}
🎤 Jesse {br}

"Hey," Birgit said, coming down to the Duck's Nest after dinner.

"Let me guess," I said. "Zahra?"

"Yeah. Are you aware she's in love with you?"

"I know," I replied. "But you know the problem, I'm sure."

"Belief in god," I said. "In theory, you both believe in the same god, but there's a disagreement depending on which prophet you think is authoritative — Moses, Jesus, or Mohammed. I think all three of them are wrong! Along with, Siddhartha Gautama, Zarathustra, Baháʼu'lláh…"

"I get it!" I said, interrupting. "Accepting your point for the purposes of this discussion, what _you_ think doesn't matter. You know what I believe and what Zahra believes, but even if that wasn't a problem, I'm not going to effectively get engaged when I'm not even seventeen! I am NOT Matthew!"

"I know you aren't a «jävla idiot», so I'm positive you didn't promise her anything. But you have a real problem."

"I know, and I'm not sure what I can do. And even if I wanted to be a couple, the only way that could happen is if I converted to Islam, and that is not happening. I know you don't believe in God, but my church is rational."

"Right, because they approve of your moms and will let them marry?"

"Even if they did, the government won't allow it, which is actually the bigger problem. You know I disagree with my church on sexual ethics, but otherwise, I don't think there's anything to which you object. Well, besides the whole idea of God. But that's not the point, really; it's that I don't think Islam properly addresses the human condition the way the Orthodox Church does. But it doesn't matter."

"What are you going to do? If her dad ever finds out, he'll lose his shit. And she's only going to be more attached if you continue 'kissing' her."

Birgit made air quotes, and I laughed.

"We haven't called it that for a LONG time!" I said. "And I know. This is one of those times when Dad would say I didn't think things through all the way."

"How so?" I asked. "I'm sure you didn't make any promises to her, and I know for a fact she came to you. She said she wanted you long before it happened."

"Again, assuming for the sake of argument that's true, I should have realized how things might go. I had similar problems with Angelina and, to some extent, CeCe. Francesca was a different story."

"And her lunatic mom wrecked things because she was determined to ensure Francesca never had sex in her entire life!"

"I don't think she was quite that insane, but close!" I said. "My point is, some girls can't handle casual sex. And you know full well that some guys can't, either. Oh, sure, they'll screw if you offer, but Philip had a similar reaction."

"I know," Birgit replied. "He's not religious, but he fell in love with me. I goofed because I didn't make it clear that I didn't want a permanent boyfriend, but now I'm not so sure."

"Who are you, and what have you done with my sister?!"

"I know, right? I put myself in a bad position again."

"Now what?"

"I invited Bob to go to Saint Martin, but he can't be my boyfriend because of Meghan, and if I ask Tomás to be my boyfriend, I can't take Bob to Saint Martin, and it would be the second time I basically blow him off for another guy."

"But neither of them cares that you're seeing another guy, right?" I asked.

"I don't think so, but I didn't see that coming with Peter and Julie. Not to mention, I'm going to Sweden for a year and don't want a long-distance relationship. That's what I told Philip, and he stopped speaking to me."

"He thought having sex made you a permanent couple?"

"I have no idea," Birgit replied. "I mean, I suspect so, but he wouldn't even talk to me."

"Well," I smirked. "There are always girls!"

Birgit laughed, "Lilibeth said the same thing! But I think she has a vested interest!"

"You think?" I grinned.

"Can I ask you a question about her? Well, and Libby?"

"Sure, Sis. What?"

"If Lilibeth liked guys, too, would you consider what Libby wants?"

I shook my head, "No. I think a committed, monogamous relationship is best for me, the same as you do. We both agreed that's after college, though I'd consider starting that kind of relationship as a Junior or Senior. You think it's after you get your first job, but we agree on the basic idea. What's _actually_ bugging you?"

"If I knew, my life would be a lot easier. What are you going to do about Zahra?"

"I have no clue. I don't want to hurt her, but I don't see how that can be avoided if she's in love with me. But I have some time to think about it before I see her again in a situation where we can actually talk. She'll have Zaida and Jamal with her on Friday, and she has to go home with Zaida right after dinner."

"Mr. Rahim is just as dumb as every other parent who thinks they can prevent their kids from having sex!"

"Oh, I know."

"Sorry, I need to leave for karate," Birgit said.

"OK."

————— {br}

_January 16, 2003, Chicago, Illinois_

"Steve, I have Julius Crane on the phone for you," Kimmy said just after lunch on Thursday.

"Put him through, please."

She put the call through, and I picked up the handset.

"Hi, Julius. What's up?"

"Hi, Steve. Detective León called to let me know that the preliminary DNA test showed no chance of a match. I'd say that, combined with the video you provided and the fact your friends verified your whereabouts, is the end of it for you. All the physical evidence is exculpatory, so, with the obvious lawyerly caveats, there is basically no chance you'd be charged."

"That's good. What about the additional information?"

"That's the second reason for my call. They, together with the investigator from DeKalb, would like to set a time to meet with you to ask you about the Instant Messages."

"What risks do I run?"

"None that I can think of," Julius replied. "I spoke with Mike Knox, and I conferred with Melanie Spencer. Everything thinks it's safe to disclose what you know. I would advise you to have counsel with you; Liz can do it if you want to save some money."

"I think I'd rather have a criminal defense attorney present," I said. "I'm OK with you continuing, as Melanie hasn't been directly involved."

"Are you free tomorrow?"

"Yes. Where?"

"I'll ask that we either do it at your office or our office. We don't want to be in a police interview room where they control everything and could record you without your agreement."

"Total BS, but I agree the courts have said the cops can lie and cheat and break the law to investigate and are almost never held accountable."

"You're talking to a former Public Defender, so I know exactly what you mean, but you'll want to keep that opinion to yourself during the interview."

"I promise to behave."

Julius laughed, "I suspect you say that to Liz fairly often."

"You suspect correctly. What time?"

"It'll be in the morning. Let me arrange it with the detectives, and I'll call you back."

"Thanks."

We said 'goodbye', and I hung up.

"Trouble?" Penny asked.

"No, Just the usual craziness that is my life! You remember I'm out on Monday and Tuesday for the annual NIKA executive retreat, right?"

"I'll actually get some work done!" Penny teased.

"You know, if it's a problem, there's still time to update the seating chart!"

"You won't do that because you love me!"

"That's true. Shall we get back to work?"

"Yes!"